Abandoning Ship

What a ride, 118 posts in 118 days. And all the things hat happened during that time. Photo shoots, dirty dancing, strip clubs, demonstratios, kung fu classes and carrying couches. I had a great time writing the posts but it also has been difficult. There is this ongoing pressure to come up with a photograph and to write a story on a daily basis. I spent hundreds of hours shooting and writing for this blog. I stayed up until 3 o’clock in the morning and made the impossible possible when there was no Internet connection available to get the post up on time. I rejected girls who wanted to take me home because that would have meant not to get the post up on time and I stayed home more often then I can count instead of going out to stick to my commitment.

The initial motivation for the blog was to let the world know who I am and to bring more people to my website to see my photography. That has failed since there has not been an increase of hits on my site. Then my motivation shifted. I had heard from people that they are inspired by what I have to say, that it makes them think about their lives and motivates them to make changes. But according to my blog statistics less and less people read the blog and leave comments.

I always said as long as I can make a small impact even if it is only on one person’s life it is all worth it but I wonder if I even have accomplish that. Meanwhile I am killing myself to write a post every day. What is my motivation now? To write for another nine month to give myself a clap on my own back for pulling it through and to be proud of myself? I don’t need that. I am feeling good about myself already. I mentioned a few months ago that I would only do what I want to do, what I am inspired to do and this new way of living includes this blog. I lost my inspiration.

If not miracle happens and I find some sort motivation to keep on going this will be my last post. I want to thank all of you guys for taking this journey with me even though it was shorter the originally planned. It felt great to be able to share some of the ideas I have with you and I hope it helped and motivated some of you to let go of limiting believes and ideas or to start taking pictures. I wish I would have the energy to continue but at the moment this blog has turned from being a joy into being a burden. I transcended many burdens in my life; I don’t want to replace them for a new one.

All the best to all of you! Good-bye world! 

 

 

 

 

“Abandoning Ship” Manhattan/New York City/44th Street between 2nd and 3rd St. 04-27-08 at 01:03 PM

Please check out my website at carstenfleck.com

 

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